We would very much like to know your views about this website. We hope you will use the blog to tell us what you think and make any suggestions for changes
This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 27th, 2007 at 10:28 am and is filed under Fairness, Relationship, Your Body, Workload, Birth, Support, Baby's Temperament, Expectations, Crying, Sleep, Soothing, Feeding, Settling, Play. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
November 27th, 2007 at 10:37 am
I love the worksheet for parents. It makes me realise how hard I work each day and that without sleep of course I am a zombie. My partner thinks that I should do what his mother did – all the housework, all the cooking, all the washing and keeping the baby happy, but he also wants me to earn a living, which his Mum never did. This website will help us talk about these things without fighting.
Zara, mother of Amy, aged 8 months.
November 29th, 2007 at 12:38 pm
I had no idea that babies needed to learn how to go to sleep. When Taylor grizzled I thought he was bored and I jiggled him around and gave him more toys, then he cried more and more and I just didn’t know what to do. I got pretty cranky with him, which used to frighten me. Now I know that he was tired and needed a sleep. He has slept much more since began using these techniques and we are both so much happier. I wish John (my husband) and I had known all this at the beginning. This website would have helped us to be cleverer parents.
Susan, mother of Taylor, aged 7 months.
May 16th, 2008 at 9:28 am
Just saw this website discussed on 9am with David & Kim. The discussion about the household workload really hit home with me. I do recall this being bought up in our prenatal classes. This even included a list of chores with a box next to them to put the initials of the person that would be responsible for these chores in and encouragement to discuss this before the birth. However, I don’t think anyone really took this seriously at the time. I know my partner and I took the approach that we would deal with it once the baby was born and the need arose, which of course in retrospect, was ridiculous.
I understand Zara’s comments above but I know that, as a stay at home mum, I assumed that I would have the time to do everything. My daughter is almost 13 months old now and I still don’t think my husband, despite his efforts, understands what I do all day.
A great website, thank you.
May 16th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Hello,
This looks great! I also saw the promo on 9am this morning and thought ‘at last’! I struggled thorugh 3 lots of post-natal depression and this website would have been a fabulous tool to assist us as a family. I got so sick of hearing about breast-feeding being the only solution to EVERYTHING…! Wonderfully well now and hoping to ‘give back’ to new parents in some way. (Any chance you’d let a layperson facilitate a trial in Brisbane??)
Great stuff.
Alison
May 16th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
I was fortunate enough to have read “babywise” and most of their thoughts are echoed here on this website. This is fantastic as we didn’t know anything 7 months ago before Mac was born. It is a STEEP learning curve and mums/dads need to know what to do when baby won’t sleep, eat, burp, poop…etc.
I watched 9am this morning and thought the comment that David said really stands true and I had never thought of it before…He said that your husband is only getting to know a side of you now (that your baby is born,) that he has never known before- and I would like to add, & “Neither did you”.
I had no idea that being radiantly pregnant would turn into being scared stiff with this wonderful creation that you have been given to care for…day in, day out…
Ahh it is all worth it, especially when that little tyke is in bed and you have a few minutes to yourself to breath and blog!
Helen (mum to a wonderful 7 month old)
May 17th, 2008 at 10:49 am
The settling techniques were put into play last night and worked a treat. The PDF sheets provide a tool that take some of the x-factor out of parenting.
Keep up the great work.
May 20th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
What a useful website. I wish it had been around in the early days after I had my two - particularly my second more challenging (yet beautiful)bub. Just reading through and seeing all these wonderful things I could have tried, might have to go back for a third just to be able to try it all out…
May 21st, 2008 at 4:28 pm
I’m a HypnoBirthing practitioner who teaches self-hypnosis to for an easier, comfortable birthing and also for the release of fear and anxiety about birth. Even though this is a wonderful programme in that it teaches the couple to work together, it doesn’t include the “fourth trimester” - i.e. life after the cherub arrives! This is a great website and I’ll recommend it to my HB couples.
June 12th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Thank you for writing so feelingly about the mixed emotions and recollections about the birth of the baby (or babies, in the case of multiple births). To understand that this time can be both happy and sad, with regrets and delights, is very important. Thanks for helping to encourage discussion and debate.
July 12th, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Thanks for the settling tips. They’re a godsend in these early weeks (our son is 3 weeks old).
I have a question, though.
Roughly how long before the babies clue in to the settling techniques? Granted we’ve only been trying them in earnest for the past 2 days. However, our son is still fighting us. I’m finding I’ll attempt the settling 3 times in one cycle but if he’s still crying, I’ll resort to other tricks to put him to sleep - like a pram walk or our mechanical rocker. Is it OK to do that? Should I be persevering with the settling techniques for an hour at a time? 2 hours at a time?
Any clues on if it’ll be a battle that will last days or weeks? I understand that every baby is different. I’m just looking for what the average is.
Ok, so that was more than 1 question. My apologies.
Thanks heaps
August 8th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
We have received some questions about how long it should take before a routine using settling techniques is established. Every baby is different, but in general it can take a few weeks for babies and parents to develop a routine that works for everyone. In the case of very young babies, it is crucial to ensure that s/he is getting enough milk and, if breastfed, that the mother’s milk supply is adequate as this can contribute to unsettled behaviour. The ‘Feed-Play-Sleep’ section of the website contains more information about this topic.
In terms of settling strategies, it is recommended to persist with settling a baby in bed for at least a half hour and to resettle for a similar period if the baby wakes after only a short sleep. As a consistent approach helps the baby experience the world as a predictable place, it is important not to dismiss a particular strategy too soon.
It would be helpful to hear comments from other parents to generate discussion about how settling techniques (from this site or elsewhere) worked for them – did it take days or weeks to develop a routine? Have you discovered any additional ‘tricks’ or techniques that proved useful and may be of help to new parents?
September 29th, 2008 at 9:05 am
Great web site. The info on sleep and settling is very handy.
I find at night when my baby wakes for a feed, to just get the feed and nappy change over with as quickly as possible. Don’t make any eye contact with the baby or speak to him. Keep the lights down and noise to a minimum. That way he gets the message it’s not play time and goes to sleep again quickly.
October 14th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
I wish I had found this website a few weeks ago when the crying seemed endless - me and my son! I agree with the comment that no one explains settling, especially re-settling. When in hospital, there was only a focus on getting the breadtfeeding right. I just kept hearing that babies under 6 months are too young for a routine (which I agree with in terms of when to feed and sleep) and assumed this meant ANY sort of routine. Now I understand it is never to early to give babies the security and comfort of a consistent way of helping them sleep, settle and re-settle. The video clips are great too - I found wrapping so frustrating going by written guidelines.
I think all maternity wards might want to consider including this workshop in their weekly schedule for new parents.
October 19th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
Great website, I have recommended it to alot of mums in our playgroup.
January 30th, 2009 at 9:28 am
The website is very useful but a bit exclusive of the diversity of families that exist in our country. I’m a mother to a 3 month old with my female partner and there are many other variations to this. The Mum/Dad set up is just common, not normal.
March 27th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
Thank you, Kate, for your important comment. Some same sex couples did participate in the trial of this intervention, and inclusive language was used in all participant interviews. However, one of the aims of the investigation (hence the language and illustrations used in the materials), was to examine fathers’ involvement in the work of parenting and determine the effectiveness of the intervention in assisting with the adjustment to their new role. This is in line with the Federal Government’s current strategy to promote the engagement of fathers. In addition, our future endeavours will involve modifying the program for a more diverse group of parents (including those from CALD backgrounds, young single mums and same sex couples) for whom the current materials will not be sufficient. We will provide more information in this space when it becomes available.
We welcome suggestions from all site visitors about ways in which the content of these materials could be modified to meet the needs of other groups, including same sex couples.
October 25th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
I have just found your website and I love it. As part of my job as a child Health Nurse I run Parenting Groups and I find the downloads excellent for teaching parents about their new babies. Parents also love the interactive part of the website. Congrats. an excellent job.