What were we thinking! promote confidence and reduce distress in parents with a first baby

"Feeling like I need to get some of me back..."

By Amy

I had always planned to go back to work after the first year, however, I am starting to have strong thoughts/feelings about going back to work early and part-time. I think these thoughts started because I feel like I need to get some of me back, the pre-Abigail me.

When I'm with Abigail and someone else, my attention is 30% on the person I'm with and 70% on Abigail, I now find it difficult to be 100% in the moment, which never use to be an issue. I have enquired about day-care and will start taking her for 2-4 hours on a Friday just so she can get use to the idea and then stretch it out to a full day.

Childcare means she will be around other children her own age, learning different games, playing with new toys, exposed to germs that will help her build up her immune system and it also means I can look after her guilt free (while I'm not working). I will keep you posted as to where my cabin-fever thoughts are heading, but for now one day of Childcare is looking good.

Expert response from What Were We Thinking! expert, Jan O'Connell

Becoming a mum brings with it gains and losses. It is common to want to resume some of the things that you experienced before your child was born such as returning to work. There are many aspects of who you are and it is an individual decision about how you want to achieve the balance in your life. Safe and caring childcare can be a happy and stimulating experience for your child.

Posted in:  Baby 21-26 weeks